You Will Attract Whatever You Allow

You will attract whatever you are willing to put up with. If you are willing to put up with someone who is flaky, you will attract someone that is a flake. If you are willing to put up with someone who will mistreat you or disrespect you, you will attract someone who will mistreat or disrespect you. If you are willing to put up with someone who takes advantage of you or take you for granted, you will attract someone who will take advantage of you and/or take you for granted.

Take a look at your relationships and see if there is a pattern of behavior that the other person exhibited that you did not particularly like that may have contributed to the demise of the relationship. The patterns of behavior displayed by your relationship partner are essentially a mirror for you, a clue to you about what you are willing to put up with. If you aren’t willing to put up with it, you wouldn’t have attracted and thus experienced it.

Hopefully you have learned from your past relationships where there were behaviors being exhibited that you didn’t like and you made a conscious choice that you had been there and done that and won’t do it again. Some of the time, this is enough to not have to experience it again. At least maybe not to the same degree. Or, it might be so subtle and look so different that you don’t recognize it as being the same bottom line pattern of behavior.

For example, if you dated someone whom you discovered you could not depend on to either be on time or show up at all and then would call with some excuse as to why the plans you made together had to be changed. You may have let them get away with it for a while, but eventually called things off as a result. Some time later, you might have experienced someone who was just late by a little every time you made plans. Because it wasn’t to the same degree as previously experienced, you still might have let them get away with it. If it doesn’t bother you, fine, but if it does, don’t put up with it from anyone that you are looking to spend your life with.

When someone does something different than what they tell you they are going to do, it is ultimately a matter of respect. You deserve to be respected enough that they at least call and explain why they are not there on time or why your plans had to change and sincerely make an attempt to not let it happen again. If they don’t, they don’t respect you. In the end, this means that you are willing to put up with disrespect. And, you don’t want to be with someone that disrespects you in any way, shape or form. It will only get worse instead of better. Find someone that respects you and that there isn’t anything about them that you would want to change and stick with them. Bottom line, whatever you are willing to put up with, that’s exactly what you’re going to attract.

If, however, you respect yourself enough to expect respect from someone you choose to be with, then you will attract someone who will treat you right. Someone who will love and accept and respect you exactly as you are because you have made it clear to yourself that you won’t accept anything less. And when you respect yourself enough that you won’t accept anything less, then you pave the way to attract the absolute love of your life. So, make it clear to yourself and others what you are and are not willing to put up with. And then you will be rewarded with exactly what you want to experience.

Stop the Negative Self Talk

We all engage in self talk. On average, research shows that each person’s self talk is around 100-150 words per minute or an astounding 45-51,000 thoughts per day. Self talk in and of itself is not a problem. It is a huge problem though if any portion of that self talk is negative.

Habitual negative self talk essentially force feeds negative suggestions into your subconscious mind. Right now, I want you begin to start paying close attention to your self talk. Over a period of a few days, you will get a pretty clear idea of just how much of your self-talk is negative.
The reason this is so important is because your self talk is self-fulfilling. What does that mean? It means that what you are force feeding into your subconscious about yourself that is negative, sometimes several times a day, you will experience in your reality.

By becoming consciously aware of and analyzing the contents of self talk, you might well find the key to why you are not experiencing success, happiness, joy and fulfillment not only in general in your life but in your relationships as well.

Are you repelling love as a result of your negative self talk? You just might be! Do you ever say things to yourself like, “Gosh, I feel like I will never meet the love of my life” or, “it seems like all the good ones are taken and I only meet the available ones that are jerks,” or whatever versions of these that suit your particular speech pattern and vocabulary.

Even if you are just saying those things out of frustration, they are being influenced by your subconscious conditioning and your continued mindless negative self talk simply continues to validate these beliefs and turn them into self-fulfilling prophecies.

It is a vicious cycle that will perpetuate itself until you become consciously aware of and don’t allow the negative self talk any more. If you find yourself engaged in negative self talk, simply and gently remind yourself that you choose not to do that any more and say something nice to yourself instead.

Being consciously aware allows you to observe your thoughts and actions so that you can live from true choice in the present moment rather than being run by programming from the past which will change your future results.